The Blago Media Blitz

whiskey

Tim, Ben, Jason and Ryan (50% of Whiskey Rebellion)

* Friday night, half of Whiskey Rebellion drove off to my hometown for the first-ever Kalamazoo Improv Festival.  We had a phenomenal crowd and an incredible show.  Faces were melted off due to overheating from too much laughter.  I don’t remember the last time we had a crowd react like that.  It was one of the best nights of my life.  Thanks to all those who came.  Next Chicago show TBA…

Amy wanted to know if any blog readers made the trip to iO for Thursday’s show.  If they were there, they didn’t introduce themselves.  Being in the presence of so many comedy geniuses can be intimidating, I know.

* “They’re” and “their” are different words meaning different things.  File this away for future use.choo_choo

* Why has no one nominated me for the Tribune’s list of Chicago’s best blogs?  You are not allowed to use the same excuse Lisa Terry used in elementary school when she “ran out” of Valentines just as she reached my desk.

* A new study says that a couple that waits to have sex can benefit from the delay.  The woman gets more time to evaluate the guy as a provider, the guy gets to prove himself as worthy.  I fail to see how this is beneficial for the guy.  The study says when a male is impatient and gives up, he probably wasn’t the right one from that female’s perspective. 

 But I think this could be a faulty conclusion.  There are lots of girls who just like guys for the attention they give them, and there’s never any romantic prospect.  In that case, the guy is just getting played.  So how long is he supposed to wait?  Is infinity long enough?

* The more a woman sends instant messages or texts with the word “I,” the happier her relationship is.  So when a girl texts me, “I am calling the cops unless you get out of my yard,” that’s a clear sign she’s digging me, right?

* It takes 30% longer to lie than tell the truth.  Which explains why I spent so much time at Thanksgiving telling all my relatives that my amazing girlfriend couldn’t make it because she was busy hunting Osama bin Ladin while mentoring blind beauty pageant contestants in the art of knife juggling.

* Zoraida tries on the Aretha hat.  Whaddya think?

arethazoraida

* In an interview with the Today Show, Governor Blagojevich compares himself to Ghandi, Martin Luther King and Nelson Mandela.  Let me suggest another leader: Julius Caesar.  Both face a quick end at the hands of the Senate.

* The Tribune suggests that Blago’s actions have cemented our new state slogan as “Come to Illinois.  Chock full o’ crazy.”

State Budget Blagojevich

Dictator for Life

* G-Rod’s PR firm (the same representing ladies’ man Drew Peterson) says the governor is only going to hit “The Today Show,” “Good Morning America,” “The View,” and “Larry King Live” because they “don’t want to overdo it.”

* Rob clued me into this amusing YouTube commercial for “Blagojevich Balls.”  (Adult language, but you’d expect that from a Blago-related item, wouldn’t you?)

* I would love to hammer the Gov. to the wall, but the last time I tried something like that, the Powers That Be pulled it off the blog.  I guess I’ll just keep linking to everyone else in the free world taking their shots.

* Wanna help fix the economy?  Take the pill, says Nancy Pelosi.

* Don’t you hate it when you’re chasing down a carjacker and he turns himself into a goat?  Yeah.  Me, too.

* Divorce makes men richer.  Wha?  Kevin Federline, maybe.

him008* Things to make you feel safe in Chicago: The 14-year-old boy who successfully passed himself off as a cop and went on patrol with a veteran for five hours before anyone figured it out.  I find this impossible to believe.  How does this happen?  Did the kid pay off the governor with his lawn mowing money to receive an appointment to the force?

* Researchers say kids need less schoolwork and more play.  I told my parents that for years, but they kept locking me in my room and forcing me to translate and transcribe entire books by Nietzsche before I was allowed to eat dinner.

* CNN tells us why women should feel good naked.  I imagine a naked woman would feel great.

* Want a new job?  Make sure you’re appropriately Botoxed.  Not sure if I buy that.  If plastic surgery made you more employable, Joan Rivers would be more ubiquitous than Ryan Seacrest.

* I spent the bulk of this weekend sleeping and catching up on TV I missed during the week.  Loved the first hour of “Lost,” but the second hour was tiresome.  I dislike Hurley intensely.  Time travel always gets a big thumbs-up from me.

* Cindy McCain was offered a slot on “Dancing with the Stars.”  John McCain was offered one on “Hunched with the Losers.”  (Sorry, Senator.  Too easy.)


For those of you seeking more information about Cody King, the article I posted came from a service called STNGWire, which collects news from around the city and feeds it to TV newsrooms.  Most news organizations do not report on suicides for fear it will trigger copycats, so that’s why you may have trouble finding the story elsewhere.  I posted the article in its entirety.

I searched for an update this morning and the only new information was that the coroner ruled that he died from injuries sustained from a fall.  Again, the verdict is suicide. My condolences to those affected.

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2 responses to “The Blago Media Blitz

  1. The pic with you & your co-horts…looks like your about 5 foot nothing…or…your co-horts are 8 feet tall….just busting your balls

  2. Nice pic = )

    In response to Amy’s wondering if any of the ladies from Gurnee got a chance to view Ben in action on Thursday.. sadly we did not.

    As far as the flirting goes? I wouldn’t label it as
    shameless. Agressive? Perhaps

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