* Way to botch the inaugural oath, Chief Justice Roberts. I swear, it looked like a moment from the old SNL “Chris Farley Show.” Remind me never to ask you to preside over a wedding. (“Do you… uh… what’s your name? David? Okay. David. Do you take this woman to be married to you through good times and health and honor and obey?”)
* I totally slept through the inauguration. Didn’t see the speech, but I read it. It looked good. I kinda like it when a politician starts using formal-speak. It’s like they’re envisioning those words being written in stone someday. What quote will be on President Bush’s monument someday? My bet: “Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.”
* Previously on the blog: My thoughts on election night in Chicago. (It was kind of a big deal.)
* The outgoing First Daughters give some advice to Sasha and Malia. (Not for nothing, but I think Barbara Bush is incredibly hot. Not the old lady version, the 27-year-old version.)
* No surprise: China censored part of the President’s speech. And I hear the guy who dubbed the speech inserted the line, “You killed my teacher. Now I must avenge him in this dojo.”
* Today Executive Producer Wendy looked up the derivation of my last name…
It is possible that in some cases the surname referred originally to someone who untangled wool with a bow. This process, which originated in Italy, became quite common in England in the 13th century. The vibrating string of a bow was worked into a pile of tangled wool, where its rapid vibrations separated the fibers, while still leaving them sufficiently entwined to produce a fine, soft yarn when spun.
Now you know. And knowing is half the battle.
* Anybody up for a “Batman Begins” / “Dark Knight” doubleheader on IMAX at Navy Pier this Friday? I’d totally jump on it, but I have an improv show that night. This gives me an idea… a blog reader field trip. I should pick a movie and invite everyone who reads the blog. It would be a great chance for you to praise or punch me, depending on your opinion of Jimmy Buffett.
* Mayor Daley wants a second professional football team in Chicago. Call me when you get one. (Zing! Take that, Bears fans!)
* And now, three ways to tell if you’re fat. Or just ask me. I’ll tell you.
* A 72-year-old Indiana man is shaving his shaggy eyebrows for charity. Meanwhile, Andy Rooney tripped on his.
* Finally got around to watching the season premiere of the final season of “Battlestar Galactica” last night. I. love. that. show. Yes, I’m a huge nerd, but even if you’re not, I think you’ll be sucked in after just a few episodes. Do yourself a favor and rent the first season. The very first episode has incredibly strong 9/11 parallels. And as the show goes on, it tackles one of the greatest questions we wrestle with today – how far are we willing to go to battle terrorism? The actors are hot, the characters are rich, the tension is incredible and the show’s creators have no qualms about major (major!) plot twists. The show will be sorely missed. (Don’t believe my recommendation? Time Magazine called it the best show of 2005.)