Principal Zod is not to be trifled with

* I’m blogging from home today.  I would have stayed at work, but my computer there is giving me grief lately.  Internet Explorer windows close down without warning.  I already lost an entire blog entry last week.  I’m not about to have that happen again.  Plus, this way I’m able to do laundry while working.  Bonus!

bigstockphoto_you_are_fired_475827* When I walked in overnight, the newsroom was abuzz about some sort of “emergency” staff meeting held yesterday.  According to rumors (which you should always believe), staff cuts are coming hot and heavy in the near future.  Someone in the network bureau has a poster of the movie “Broadcast News” in the office.  Imagine that scene where Jack Nicholson shows up to watch everyone cleaning out their desks.  That’s what I’m anticipating.  Of course, we’re only hearing about this meeting 2nd-or-3rd-or-4th hand, so maybe the brass actually said we’re having an ice cream party and the whole thing got lost in translation.

One coworker asked why the morning team wasn’t invited to this Doomsday Meeting.  Probably for the same reason a ninja never alerts his prey before he strikes.

* This year’s must-have psychiatric disorder is… “Truman Show” Syndrome, where you believe your life is secretly  being staged and videotaped.

* Tomorrow is the last day for our NBC5 morning food drive.  I believe at last check, we’d collected zero items.  I think people are apt to donate food in their offices and churches, but it’s probably not one of those things where you say, “Hey, Honey!  Pack up the F-150!  We’ve gotta drive down to 401 North Michigan Avenue between 4:30-7 a.m. to donate food!”

* Enjoy 100 budget-friendly Christmas shopping sites. When selecting a gift for your favorite blogger, remember that money is no object.  (Although, for the record, I would not object to money.)

new2016logo* Today is (mercifully) the last day to submit a video to help Chicago land the 2016 Olympics.  At last count, we had a whopping 18 submissions.  Maybe that’s because you couldn’t find anything about the contest on the official website until approximately a week ago.  That’s about as crazy as not having a direct link to this blog on NBCChicago.com.

* Here is a list of 8 high-stress jobs. “Morning news producer” is strangely absent.

According to the article, stress is generated by: long hours with few or no breaks, employees unable to participate in the decision-making process, and job insecurity and large amounts of impending change.

Wow.  They just described every morning at NBC5.

* Need help making ends meet?  Here are some tips from America’s cheapest families. I’m a little skeptical about #7 – “More children = more kidneys for sale.”

* Todd Stroger learns the hard way that raising the sales tax doesn’t equal a boatload of free money.

I was so awful at economics that I changed my major in college to avoid it.  But here’s the principle as I understand it…

cookiemonster“Hey!  Want a cookie?”
“Sure.  How much?”
“$4,000.”
“Oh, no thanks.”

Now let’s try that scenario another way…

“Hey!  Want a cookie?”
“Sure.  How much?”
“12 cents.”
“Thank you, I will buy ten of them.”

I don’t know about you, but I try to avoid shopping in the city whenever possible.

* A central Illinois school is apologizing after forcing all its children to kneel in an assembly.  Although after you see this video of the assembly, it’s easier to understand…

* Speaking of General Zod, this tribute site has to be one of the greatest things on the internet.

* You know that $326 billion bailout we’re giving to Citigroup?  $400 million of that is going to… the New York Mets?!?

* 13-year-old boy arrested for passing gas.  Where were these cops when my brothers were terrorizing me?

* You know all that luck that’s vanished on Wall Street?  This guy stole it. Let us find him and break him open like a piñata so that all the good luck may distribute itself equally across the country.

kodosavatar* People believe in aliens and ghosts more than God. Even if you don’t believe in the Almighty, why would you tempt Him with your stated disbelief?  Haven’t we been through enough lately without tempting the Big Guy to unleash Armageddon on us?

* The Oakland Raiders surpass the Detroit Lions in the race to become the first team to suck in 3D.

*Jason Piazza is the smartest man alive.  And he is awesome.  But how did he get that way?  Jason explains his secret source of cool…

Send all your questions to AskJasonPiazza@gmail.com

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