The Halloween to end all Halloweens

* Today was our enormous Halloween spooktacular.  My show was nearly flawless, and that’s a credit to the crew and talent who played ball.  It’s difficult to make a regular show look clean.  But when you add all the variables we had today, you just hold your breath and pray for a miracle.  The team came through with flying colors.  (I will aim to post YouTube videos of the results as soon as I can.)

* Rob, Matt and I spent Tuesday night hunting ghosts.  We investigated the site of the Eastland Disaster, the Hull House (home to a demon baby!) and the site of the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre.  Then we broke loose from our tour guide and made our way to a cemetery, where Rob swears ghosts left him voicemails.  I wonder if ghosts wait for the beep, or if they just keep on moaning.  (YouTube video of our investigation will also be forthcoming.)

* With all the Halloween insanity today, we got some fun e-mails from our viewers.

YOU GUYS ARE JUST TOO WEIRD! LMAO!

and…

What the hell are you guys smoking? and is it legal?

and…

This a.m.’s broadcast was so bad I could not change the channel fast enough! Seriously, you are NOT SNL. I have not seen anything so bad on tv for a long time. Painful to watch. So bad in fact, I switched to Channel 2 and plan on staying there. Hopefully your ‘beast’ will get your producer.

Signed,
Disgusted

Really, “Disgusted”?  I’d say that’s more a punishment for you than for us.  Zing!

* The only people more upset are the whiny Parrotheads who think I’m missing out on some sort of cosmic joy connection by refusing to line up to the bong and take a hit of Jimmy Buffett’s awful music.  I’d rather listen to William Hung.

* Wanna make fake blood for a party tonight?  Fellow Whiskey Rebellion member Nick Hausman joined us on the air to demonstrate his recipe.  Check it here.

* Speaking of Whiskey Rebellion, why not clear your calendar and join usat the iO Theater (3541 N Clark) this Sunday at 8:00 p.m.?  We will rock your faces off with improvised hilarity.

* Six things not to do on a first date.  Number 1: Announce, “Hi, I’m NBC5 4:30 a.m. news producer Ben Bowman.”

* Overweight and obese women have more sex than skinny types.  Wait for it.  Wait for it.  There’s that terrifying mental image.

* Last night I had a brilliant time, hitting the Trails of Terror in Peterson Park and then drowning myself in an endless meat splurge at Texas de Brazil.  That was my first time at a Brazilian steakhouse and it won’t be the last.  It was like a total stiff-arm to vegetarians everywhere.  I did my part to eliminate global carbon emissions by inhaling entire herds of animals.  By the end of the night, I was sweating gravy.

* Apologies for the brevity of this post, dear readers.  I am pretty fried after a crazy morning.  Oh, and I’m sweating gravy.

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