Scarlet Fever

* Can I ramble for a moment about a major work annoyance?  I’m talkin’ passwords.  I have separate usernames and passwords for…

1) logging on to the computer in the first place
2) iNews – the program we use to create our newscasts
3) VOD – the website showing videos fed down from NBC network sources
4) Storm – the website that shows our work schedules
5) StingWire – a website tracking Chicago-area breaking news
6) CMS– the website to add a story to
7) Getty Images– the site that supplies images we use for

and in my case…

8) WordPress – the website I use to do this blog

Eight.  EIGHT freakin’ passwords and EIGHT freakin’ usernames.  And don’t forget the PIN to retrieve your voicemails.  Of course, all the passwords expire with random frequency, so you have to keep updating them to something different.  And you know the great irony?  To sign on to the computer in the first place, we use something called an “SSO number.”  SSO stands for “single sign on.”  Ain’t nothin’ single about it.

* Men find women who wear red more beautiful.  When on a date with a woman wearing red, men will spend more money on her.  For my only date over the last decade, my date wore a burlap sack.  But my cousin has never been known for her fashion sense…

* This chick was arrested when she climbed off the stripper pole and keyed her ex-boyfriend’s car.  Wow.  I’d let her key my car without pressing charges, so long as I got to watch.

* Letterman and Leno are lighting up McCain.  They’re hammering him on jokes by a 7:1 ratio, compared to Obama.  Maybe because it’s easy to joke about McCain’s age while Obama’s (ahem) demographic makes him a harder target.  You can’t really joke about Palin or Clinton without being called a sexist or misogynist.  Or maybe you can chalk this up to McCain’s campaign being truly ridicule-worthy.  Depends on your politics, I suppose.

* Overheard in the newsroom today: “Girl, Vaseline is for everything.”

* I bet you were wondering who won this year’s American Mustache Institute “Robert Goulet Memorial Mustached American of the Year” award.  Wonder no longer!

* This was one of my favorite moments of the year.  Early in the show, Rob talks about watching Olympic trampoline.  Later in the show, well, see for yourself…

In case that fat kid on the trampoline looks familiar, he comes from a previous highlight of my career. (37,706 hits and counting…)

* For $29.95, you can get your very own Barack-in-the-box.  It’s basically a Jack-in-the-box that plays “Hail to the Chief.”  This is not to be confused with our current vice president in a box, immortalized by that Justin Timberlake song on SNL…

* Now for a quick parenting quiz! 

Which of the following is a good idea:
A) Letting your 8-year-old fire an uzi
B) Not doing that

If you answered “A,” read this and get back to me.

* Tonight, Rob and I go out on our top secret Halloween project.  I don’t want to ruin anything, but the 4:30 a.m.  show this Friday is going to be mind-blowing.

* We have spent a trillion dollars on the war in Iraq.  One. Trillion.  According to that story, we could have used the money to pave every highway in America in gold leaf.  Or we could have bought an iPod for every living human on the planet.  And this site lets you go on a shopping spree with the cash.  Makes you wonder what drove us to spend so much.  Maybe we were trying to impress a woman in red.

One response to “Scarlet Fever

  1. Remind me to wear red and/or key your car on our next date!

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