Drunken Frat Boys vs. T Rex

* “Hey!  Who wants to get totally blitzed and throw stuff at a T Rex?”

* NBCChicago.com continues to disappoint.  Search for “breakfast blog” and the top result is a recipe for jalepeño poppers.  Really?  Do appetizers blog? 

I remain a nonbeliever when it comes to this “nobody browses, everybody must now search” mandate.  A working search function is a great feature, but since 99% of website search boxes fail, I don’t understand how we expect Planet Earth to change its habits overnight.

* The bathrooms are finally operational.  Sure, just as I finish digging that hole back in the sports department…

* SNL brings back Will Ferrell’s “Dubya” to endorse John McCain. This also serves to illustrate how poor the present cast imitates the Prez.  (Sorry, Sudeikis.  You’ve got one gear.)

* In other news, Opie, Andy Griffith and Fonzie are backing Obama.

* Staying with political comedy, I caught Second City’s enjoyable “No Country for Old White Men”last night.  I was especially happy to see iO alums Pat O’Brien, Emily Wilson and Brad Morris in the Mainstage cast.  Did I just say “iO”?  Reminds me of something wonderful happening tonight at 8 p.m. 

* Sarah Palin sex doll?!?

* You know the election is going too far when… a McCain volunteer is beaten up and has the letter “B” carved in her face.

* Today I learned that we will have the NBC5 helicopter in the air by 4:30 a.m.  the day afterthe election.  Presumably, this will allow us to show an aerial view of the field several thousand Obama supporters abandoned hours before. 

* This afternoon, I meet with NBC5 Assistant News Director Chris Peña.  Not sure why I’m giving him a name drop when he hasn’t yet sprung for pizza.  Anyway, I’m sure he just wants to shake my hand and to ask me to autograph his bicep.  That’s usually what such NBC brass meetings entail.  Our last assistant news director immediately ran to the tattoo parlor to have my autograph immortalized.

* 36-year-old silverback gorilla still single after a fruitless eight-year search for a mate.   8-year dry streak, huh?  Rookie.

* Today I heard roughly 45 minutes of various producers arguing about which music to use in their newscast.  I don’t have that problem because I have actual work to do.

* Overheard on today’s newscast…

ANCHOR 1: “Last night brought the final special edition of ‘Saturday Night Live’ on a Thursday.”
ANCHOR 2: “We were just talking about haunted houses.  Anyway, an old friend of the show returned for a special endorsement.”

Pop quiz: Which of those 3 sentences does not belong?

* Remember, kids, always wear a helmet…

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